i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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