is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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