Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Randomize
