yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
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