Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
