He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Randomize
