Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
the liver wants what the liver wants
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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