mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
We are two peas in an std pod
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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