Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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