JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
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