Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
