Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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