What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
