Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
