This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
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