covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
