Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
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