I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
