Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Randomize
