it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize
