taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
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