I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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