I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Randomize
