YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
