I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
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the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
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I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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