"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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