Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
He felt like a one man threesome
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
