If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
