"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
