Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Randomize
