i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Houston, we have a squirter
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Randomize
