He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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