Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
