I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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