I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
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