How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
