porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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