But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Swine flu. Run for my life!
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Randomize
