I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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