Someone shit on the floor
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
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