"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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