i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
