goodnight i made you a song goodbye
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize
