her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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