when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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