I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.