so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
