I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize