I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
