i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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